Australians are calling for Canadian Olympic gold medalist Ethan Katzberg to get a DNA test because of his appearance.

A week after opening ceremonies included an act that outraged millions, the 2024 Olympics have already seen too much controversy.

At the openly blasphemous Olympics, the woke mob received its pound of flesh when Ballard lost his job over a lame-yet-tame joke about women.

The quick response of an Australian father likely saved his young daughter from being killed by a kangaroo.

"He wasn't being silly, but he just stumbled somehow, went through a skylight and then landed on his back," the man's brother said.

"I mean, Australia coming out on top of the world is one thing, but it is just so much sweeter beating America," the swimmer said.

"This species is not aggressive and will usually retreat before attacking," a government fact sheet proclaimed.

Faced with disruptions to his comedy performance, Seinfeld mocked a self-righteous, anti-Israel protester and thus made him part of the show.

It wasn't the first time that the consulate had been vandalized by pro-Hamas, anti-Israel protesters recently.

Sometimes, the attempt to cheat death with untested technology will only lead you to a much more gruesome fate.