Watch: Stephen Colbert Starts His First Post-Election Show with a Vulgar Outburst
CBS late-night talk show host Stephen Colbert is not taking Republican Donald Trump’s Tuesday election win well.
The outspoken liberal, pro-Kamala Harris comedian began his Wednesday night monologue, “Well, f***. It happened. Again.”
“After a bizarre and vicious campaign fueled by a desperate need not to go to jail, Donald Trump has won the 2024 election,” Colbert continued. “The deep shock and sense of loss is enormous. But let’s look at the bright side. This way at least there’ll be a peaceful transfer of power.”
“Now as a late-night host, people often say to me, ‘Come on, part of you has gotta want Trump to win, because he gives you so much material to work with,’” he said. “No. No one tells the guy who cleans the bathroom, ‘Wow, you must love it when someone has explosive diarrhea; there’s so much material for you to work with!’”
Colbert then returned to one of Democrats’ top talking points of this campaign cycle, contending Trump winning the election is a threat to democracy.
“I wish, you wish, so many of us wish this hadn’t happened,” he said, “but that is not for any of us to decide. This is a democracy. That’s Democracy with a capital ‘duh’. And in this democracy, the majority has spoken, and they said they don’t care that much about democracy.”
WARNING: The following videos contain language that some may find offensive.
The Late Show host congratulated Harris and her running mate Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz for an “amazing” 107-day campaign.
Colbert had Harris on his program as a guest last month, and Walz sat down with him earlier this week before the election.
During his Wednesday monologue, Colbert said, “This is rough. Last time Trump won, it felt like a grotesque fluke. This time America knew exactly what they were getting, and they went hard for him anyway.”
The program opened with Colbert sitting at his desk and talking to the camera in a somber tone, saying he was not doing great, and assumed the viewers were not either.
But the comedian promised he was going to go tell some jokes, “’cause that’s what we do. And I’ll let you in on a little secret: No one gets into this business because everything in their life worked out great, so we’re built for rough roads.”
Meanwhile, ABC’s late-night host Jimmy Kimmel was actually moved to tears by Trump’s victory.
“Let’s be honest, it was a terrible night last night,” Kimmel said. “It was a terrible night for women, for children, for the hundreds of thousands of hard-working immigrants who make this country go …”
NEW: Late-night host Jimmy Kimmel starts crying on his show, says election night was a terrible night for everyone including people who voted for Trump.
I’m doing pretty good, thanks for asking.
“It was a terrible night last night… It was a terrible night for hard-working… pic.twitter.com/f3Yy6Dy6l8
— Collin Rugg (@CollinRugg) November 7, 2024
At that point, his voice broke. The audience clapped as he paused and lowered his head, apparently trying to compose himself, or perhaps just for dramatic effect.
“For health care,” he continued, “for our climate, for science, for journalism, for justice, for free speech. It was a terrible night for poor people, for the middle class, for seniors who rely on Social Security, for our allies in Ukraine …”
Once again, his voice broke, and the audience applauded.
Kimmel, like Colbert, often uses his monologues to attack Trump.
During an appearance on MSNBC’s “Morning Joe” that aired last week, Kimmel said, “I’m an optimistic person.”
Jimmy Kimmel admits he suffers from Trump Derangement Syndrome pic.twitter.com/SYNVktbonp
— End Wokeness (@EndWokeness) October 23, 2024
“I’m not hysterical, I laugh when people say, ‘Oh, you’ve got Trump Derangement Syndrome,’” he continued. “If you’re a reasonable person, you should have Trump Derangement Syndrome.”
So for both Colbert and Kimmel, Trump’s overwhelming win was tough to bear.
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